When we first moved to Italy, I had a video chat with a friend. She and her husband recently relocated back to the States. They purchased a house and moved in after nearly two months of living in a hotel.
During our chat, she told me about their home improvement projects—painting, electrical work, and landscaping. She mentioned repainting her laundry room for the second time. When her husband asked why she was repainting, she said I came to mind. My friend replied, “It’s just paint. I’m just playing.”
I’ll admit, I was surprised by her association with me and the word “play”. Growing up, I rarely attempted something unless I knew I would succeed. I (still) struggle with a lot of creative work. Maybe that’s why.
I’m never sure if it will succeed.
Play Requires Courage
For example, I always wanted to learn to paint. For many years, I owned paint and brushes. Occasionally, I would swish paint around in a sketchbook, but I never had the courage to really try. I knew whatever ended up on the canvas would be less than what I imagined in my head.
Nobody likes to be disappointed.
The fear of imperfection has often kept me from attempting much in the creative space. Writing for a public audience (more than just journaling for myself) opens one up to a whole host of undesirable outcomes.
What if nobody reads what I wrote? What if everybody reads but no one likes it? What if someone misunderstands my writing? What if I hurt someone’s feelings or embarrass myself?
Of course, there’s no way to stop these what-if scenarios from running rampant in my head. But I am constantly reminding myself that there is no perfection. There is no way to account for or control every possible outcome.
But play offers us a chance to be courageous and gives us a space to make mistakes. We can push perfection off to the side and say, “It’s okay; I’m just playing.”
We can throw off the boundaries placed on so many areas of our lives. There are no metrics to meet, no one to impress, no grades given. We do not need to explain ourselves. As adults, an attitude of play allows us to shake off the expectations that keep us rigidly in line in so many other areas of our lives.
Play, and by extension, creativity, is not a waste of time. It is an act of courage.
Perfection Is Not Welcome Here
We spend so much of our lives trying to meet metrics or measure success. As adults, it often feels unnatural to play or try something new creatively.
My type A personality is not great at play. Even when I’m playing with my kids, sometimes I struggle. For them, play in and of itself is valuable. I have to fight back against my adult nature. Their play doesn’t have to go anywhere or mean anything. It just is. It doesn’t have to make sense, be cohesive, or be productive.
Growing up, I felt the pressure of perfection (and still do sometimes). Looking back, I spent much of my energy trying not to inconvenience, disappoint, or fail anyone.
Feelings of failure, embarrassment, or disappointment often keep us from playing. No one wants to fail. No one wants to be seen as less than or wanting.
Our worth is not found in our proximity to perfection. Like play, we are valuable simply because we are. We don’t need a reason.
Maybe I could learn something here.
Play for Its Own Sake
These days, I’m learning the value of play, particularly as it relates to creativity. I’m learning that trying something just for its own sake is okay, and maybe even necessary.
Through play, we can almost always discover something new. Wandering without a clear path often points us in a particular direction. We learn what we like and don’t like, what comes easily to us, and what might require a bit more effort.
Play gives us confidence. It helps us work out hangups, fosters new ideas, and can help us get into a state of flow. Play can also help reduce stress.
It can be difficult to let go of our preconceived ideas about something (mostly about ourselves). Gearing your mind towards playing can help. Take my kids, for instance. A small circle of wood can be so many things—a coin, a cracker, a stepping stone, or a “veggie pizza, with sausage, cheese, and banana,” as my son told me this morning.
You can add a little more play to your day with any sort of creative endeavor, such as dabbling in painting, knitting, or tweaking different bread recipes. There’s creativity in hairstyles, workout routines, writing, your daily outfits, and even your morning coffee routine.
It takes courage to step outside of ourselves and play. Like so many other things, it is a muscle that needs exercising. So, here’s your permission. Step out in faith and go do the thing.
Don’t be afraid. Go play.
