A few months ago, I caught a snippet of a Mike Todd sermon. I don’t listen to him regularly, although I did start following him on Instagram years ago.
The idea behind the sermon was one I hadn’t given much thought to before. Basically, the idea was: resolve over results.
I think about this most clearly in relation to my recent “workout” journey, although it could apply to many areas of life. I put “workout” in quotes because it’s an idea I’m holding very loosely.
For a long time, I didn’t even want to name it anything, because I didn’t want or need it to be a formal thing. (Does that make sense?) Honestly, I don’t even really like to talk about it. But it’s one of the best illustrations I have from my actual life.
Resolve > Results and the Person I Want to Be
I’ve always had a lukewarm relationship with my physical body. Mostly, she does what I ask of her and doesn’t complain. I’m generally healthy, and I have a lot to be thankful for on that front. But, for a good portion of my life, I haven’t liked what looks back at me from the mirror.
In all honesty, I haven’t hated it either. I’m just…lukewarm. Looking at my reflection, there are things I’d like to change, but usually not so much that I put forth any effort to actually change them. But after two kids in two years, I finally felt ready to change. So, I resolved to start moving my body more.
There are very few physical activities I enjoy doing. And during this season of life, those I do enjoy aren’t available to me. But from May to September of last year, I started doing workout videos three days a week during the kids’ naptime. (Then my husband went on a work break, and I lost the habit. Add in personal loss and a season of grief, and I’m only just starting to feel ready to find the habit again.)
It wasn’t perfect. I wasn’t perfect. And I enjoyed almost none of it.
And maybe worse yet, the weight didn’t really come off. In the first two weeks, I saw some change, but after that, it slowed considerably and then stopped altogether. I was making an effort to work out for 20-30 minutes three times a week, but I weighed almost the same as I did when I started.
But somewhere along the way, at least for a little while, the motivation shifted away from losing weight. Instead, it became about the kind of person I wanted to be. I don’t necessarily want or need to be known as the “workout friend.” If you know me in real life, I think we all know that’s not my personality. (I’m more the coffee, sweet treat, let’s-go-thrifting friend.)
But I did want to be known as the “friend who does what she says she will.”
Or “the friend who keeps going even when it’s hard, or if she doesn’t like it, or if it doesn’t change her how she thinks it should.”
Writing as a Practice of Resolve
Another example is this blog. I don’t have many readers, and most of you who read regularly, I actually know in real life. Generally speaking, this is not a far-reaching project. (Even though, at one point, I might have hoped it would take off.)
But still, every week, I show up. Behind the scenes, I write most days of the week.
On days when a post doesn’t perform well, or someone unsubscribes from the newsletter, I have to remind myself it’s not a numbers game. Instead, it’s about forming the muscles that it takes to keep showing up even when it’s hard. It’s about walking down the road, even if you don’t like the view, or the trail gets rocky.
If I based the value of this blog solely on the number of readers, I should have bowed out years ago.
Instead, daily writing, with the intent of sharing in a public space, gives me the opportunity to figure out how I really feel about something. Writing practice keeps me inspired because creativity breeds creativity. And, maybe somewhere along the way, someone will read a post that makes them feel less alone.
We Get to Keep Going
Resolve over results. A results mindset means we have an end goal in mind, a time when we can pack it in and say, “ok, I’m done. I’ve done the thing.” Results mean we’re measuring and comparing.
But resolve means we don’t have a definite finish point. Instead, we get to keep growing, changing, and learning. Resolve means we’re on the journey, trusting the process.
If we’re in it for the long haul, for the resolve, we get to keep going. Even if there’s no measured result, we get to keep doing the thing. How lucky are we?!
So much of what we do in life isn’t linear. Like working out. That habit gets derailed all the time. I need to clean the bathrooms. Husband is on a half-day schedule and home after lunch, so all motivation goes out the window. My children aren’t napping; instead, they need constant attention. Try as I might, any number of tasks can replace my workout time.
But still, I try more often than not to do something. I’m far from perfect at it. I’ve stopped and started more often than I have consecutive days in the bank. But a resolve over results mindset isn’t linear.
Just keep walking.
If you’ve started a new project lately or are working on forming a new habit, which way do you find yourself leaning? Are you measuring each part, focusing on the results of your efforts? Or are you enjoying the journey and focusing on the person you’re becoming?
May we be people of resolve, more in tune with ourselves and the person we are becoming.
